Myth: Men rarely assault their wives.
Reality: Wife assault is more common than you might think. One in four Canadian women have experienced some form of abuse in their lifetime.
Myth: Most abused women are young and poor.
Reality: Abuse occurs among women of all ages and income levels. Similarly, abuse occurs in all racial, ethnic, and social groups.
Myth: Women often provoke their partners to violence.
Reality: Domestic violence stems from the abuserâs desire for power and control. Even something very minor, such as buttering toast the wrong way, can trigger an abuserâs fury. An abuser who says, âShe made me do it,â is avoiding responsibility for his actions.
Myth: Maybe you tell yourself the hurtful behavior would stop if only he would stop drinking or start taking his medication.
Reality: The true cause of abuse is the abuserâs desire to control another human being. An abuser who blames alcohol and drugs is shirking responsibility for the harm he has caused.
Myth: The children are not impacted because they are asleep when the abuse takes place.
Reality: Children see and hear much more than we think. They are aware of the violence and the tension. Living with the fear and violence can change who they are forever.
Myth: Men who assault their partners are mentally ill or it is just anger gone out of control.
Reality: Woman abuse is not just anger out of control, the abuse is very controlled. An abuser doesnât scream and yell or lash out at a waitress, or their boss or the neighbor. The abuse is targeted directly towards their wife or partner. Often when neighbours are interviewed after a murder/suicide they comment on what a nice guy he was. Mentally ill people would not be able to practice selective violence of this kind.
Myth: Men are just as likely as women to be victims of domestic assault.
Reality: More than 90 percent of charges involving domestic assault in Ontario are laid against men.